Friday, April 13, 2007

i'm just thinking

The Law of Attraction (a phrase which used to evoke in me a quiet sense of occult wisdom because I used it in my Wiccan spells and had read about its origin in Ceremonial Magic and now puts me in a slightly embarrassed mood because I come across as a culty pop-psych


It's time for a quarter jar. Molly has started randomly decided to mimick. She said "Shiiii" and thankfully stopped yesterday. This morning the word of the day was "Yuck," which happens to rhyme with Mama's Very Favorite Word. So, the cursing needs to stop.

Secret fangirl) is so cool. I was surfing my blogroll and came across a simple word. Unlearn. It was on A Few Good Memes, and it popped out at me like it was highlighted and underlined. Like in A Beautiful Mind when Professor whassname (another vaguely crazy WV native. Um, only without the vaguely) sees the hidden code in the magazines.

I think my blogging has brought me into contact with so many amazing people, and each of you teaches me so much. I feel very intellectually enriched lately, and so thanks for that.

Unlearn. It's a lovely lesson for today. Allow myself to unlearn the habits that are negative. It's counter to the dogma of The Secret dudes, who would say I'm focusing on what I don't want, but I need to clear out some brain junk. My dreams are filled with these slightly disturbing symbols that make me feel like a Freud textbook and are really getting on my nerves. Time to address them and move on. I think I'm in need of some off-the-record-handwritten-in-a dusty-book journaling to work through that.

I'm blocked where the Secret stuff is concerned, and I'm a little pissed with myself about it. I've been trying to compose a Gratitude List in praise of what the Verse/Goddess/God has given me/us. I keep qualifying shit and being distinctly ungrateful. Like this: "Thank you for this warm and sturdy home where I dwell with my family," and then my mind wanders to only we're behind on the mortgage and the carport roof leaks and.... So I feel like an asshole. I am grateful for so much,- Hello? Happiest Mom in the world? but I keep worrying over the other details.

I think putting it on paper's the route to go, then I can meditate on it. So, dusty paper journal it is.

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