Monday, March 10, 2008

lazybones

I was in the ninth circle of gastroinstestinal hell this weekend. Dinner Friday was a (really amazingly delish) cheesy pizza, half a pan of Krispy treats, and two cheap beers. Breakfast the following morning killed me. The grandies made omelets and biscuits and breakfast rice (do y'all eat that outside WV? It's rice with milk, vanilla, and 100 pounds of white sugar.) I ate enough for three people. Then I didn't shit for two days, and barely ate because I felt that horrible stuffed feeling the whole weekend. I could not digest that freaking breakfast. Yesterday I felt so sick. So I finally pooped after laxative intervention and it was heavenly and I have mostly consumed smoothies for two days.

I feel like the binge drinker who has the hangover from hell and swears off booze until next weekend, but I really have been feeling like hell when I eat white flour and dairy stuff. I eat this heavy junk and I feel so sluggish and gunked up I can't stand myself. I'm annoyed at the inconvenience of my insight- it sucks to have to put so much goddamn effort into nutrition when my grocery stores and family make it so much easier to just dump processed calories into my gut and call it good if there's no actual meat going in.

I have this thing. I have huge grandiose ideas. I am going to Revamp My Life, and also Change the World. Oh, wait... that requires effort? Mmm. Er, oh. Sheeessss. Nevermind.

This thing I have? Laziness. It's annoying to admit that. I want to have some complex and interesting thing going on, or some like... psychological diagnosis. Some excuse, actually.

But no. I'm just fucking lazy.

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