Wednesday, April 23, 2008

a list of aesthetic sins, in my worldview


  • Neatly trimmed forsythia bushes. They should be wild and wavy.

  • P0rn star pubic hair grooming. For similar reasons.

  • Stripey highlights

  • Fake flowers

  • Patterned, ornate silverware. I like simple and heavy flatwear.

  • Papyrus, Comic Sans, and Monotype Corsiva

  • Men's T-shirts on my body

  • Tapered leg pants

  • Mullets

  • Military hair cuts

  • American Flags. Most flags, actually.

  • Pierced ears on small babies

  • Those dumb ass girly baby headbands that look like cheesy cheap wedding garter belts

  • Bubble gum pink

  • Vinyl siding

  • Fake wood paneling

  • Fake wood anything

  • The panties I'm wearing

  • Tribal tattoos that don't mean anything

  • Most tattoos chosen from flash tacked to the walls of the shop

  • Red hair with my complexion, but I didn't used to get that

  • Chain link fences

  • White picket fences

  • White boring walls in my house

  • Caucasian Jesus

  • Geometric, flat color minimalism

  • These goddamn orange fucking dots.

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