Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Continuing Non-Adventures

I'm all better from the discogram, and back to my regular pain level- tolerable when horizontal. However, I have a lingering rash that makes me want to tear the skin off my arms and legs. I have a new PCP, Dr. R, who thinks it's a reaction to the contrast dye (see? I KNEW that shit was evil) rather than the post-op Keflex because I've had penicillin family drugs before with no reaction. So, the Benadryl coma started Sunday has continued, and that was remarkably unbloggable. My life in general is pretty devoid of blog fodder, 'smatterafact. I've had to ignore a few art opportunities and can't work on sketches very long. I think I've hit a critical mass with frustration and found "productivity surrender"- Mostly.

Dr. R impressed me. She was more thorough in the first exam than I've experienced and she was careful to explain everything in a manner that actually respected my intelligence. She was also my first doctor who echoed my own curiosity about the clusters of birth defects, which she calls malformations. Again, for the record, I don't really care what they're called, although 'anomalies' makes me feel a little bit like Neo.

Tomorrow, I go in to see Dr. B at the pain center to discuss treatment now that we know the disc is trashed. In the hospital, I heard him say he recommended spinal fusion and told me to start researching neurosurgeons. Shane has since told me that he threw out some other options, but I only heard "spinal fusion." Tomorrow I'll be free of morphine and anesthesia, so I'll be in full form with note taking and question-firing. The spinal fusion scares the holy shit out of me, so I really hope that's not going to happen. The recovery is a finances-killing 3 to 6 months, sometimes more. I don't know if it's possible for the YW to hold my position for that long. On the other hand, treating symptoms for ages could just prolong the inevitable. The surgery is just too big to digest, so I'm not going to get freaked out until/unless I need to. (Also, I took everyone's advice and found a psychotherapist to help me navigate all this stress, and I like her as well.)

Until tomorrow then, I shall enjoy my insane medicated dreams and the TV premiere season- a thing I've never appreciated so much in my LIFE.

Whats going on in your world? What was your take on Ashton Kutcher? That was VERY important- you must have an opinion, right?

{Note: This post was written before my diagnosis of phocomelia. Read about the shockingly wonderful moment when I was accidentally diagnosed, or read all my posts about my strange body.} 


  1. Oh, my dear, who actually has better things to do than watch TV, Ashton Kutcher is an actor who is 1. more famous than talented, 2. married to Demi Moore and is like 20-nothing, and 3. just debuted as the replacement for Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. As he has the same not-total-just-almost lack of talent as Mr. Sheen, the show remains firmly mediocre.