Sunday, November 3, 2013

#NaBloPoMo Autumn Impression


Autumn ebbs like the tides or moon,
the sky is now a chill perfect blue
and then a steel gray haze. 
We turn tail from contentment to sorrow. The world is small and warm, and we nestle together with our animals. 

---

It's fall once again, and though I prefer the much more lyrical autumn, "fall" isn't without appeal. I am a woman who spent most if her life obsessed with one single myth: the cycle of Persephone. I've eased out of identifying as much with it as I did in my maiden life now that I'm solidly a Demeter figure, but she'll always be truly beloved. And I'll always see things through that lens of paganism. Maiden, Mother, Crone. It's a mode of interpreting among many.

I have seasonal affective disorder, and that could be the most easy parallel ever between psychology and mythology. I haven't fallen into my fallow state yet, but I've felt the first tastes. I usually skate on a creative high through Halloween and then step off an abrupt Hadean cliff.

My pain is in an intense flare-up, and I'm feeling intense frustration about it, and bring stuck in my bed. I 
hate that I'm still learning how much I have to plan to scale back. Often, I still kick and scream inside, but there are some times of peaceful flow-being when I accept my now.

I'm finishing a collossal marathon of Battlestar Galactica today, then I'm (finally) doing my media fast. I'll be online, just not passively watching. I'm going to blog daily, maybe doing vlogs when writing is too hard- my meds make my vision blurry sometimes. 

I'll write a couple of extra days into December to cover the skipped days. In my narcotic daze I just forgot that I'd planned this. 

Be well, my sorely-missed bleaders. Much love from me, Finn, and his woobie:


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